One of the ironies of professional services is that the experts’ many years of training fails to prepare them for one of the most critical aspects of their work. Networking. Even though we like to think we’re instructed because we’re the best, quite often it’s simply because the client likes us. It’s a reality that clients need to know you exist and how they feel about you before they want to instruct you.
Which begs the question why, amid the years of technical learning, so little education goes into relationship building skills.
Professionals know networking is important but often find it difficult or don’t know why it doesn’t work for them. Some fear it undermines their credibility or makes them seem pushy. Introverted, analytical people often find networking events draining and avoid them. Firm culture can add another barrier as billable hour pressures ensure client work takes precedence over relationship-building. That means there's minimal training or mentorship, and early entry professionals often believe they should wait until they are manager level before networking. They miss crucial years not just of relationship development but learning how to do it.
Without clear guidance, people attend random events rather than building targeted relationships. They see networking as transactional rather than relational, expecting immediate returns and abandoning efforts when business doesn't result quickly. Many are left alternating between awkward networking attempts and complete avoidance. This is networking not working.
Improvement requires a mindset shift, viewing networking as learning rather than selling, approaching conversations with genuine curiosity about others' challenges rather than looking for opportunities for themselves.
Imagine you’re the client. What would make it easier for you to engage in conversation? It’s not a pre-prepared line about who you are and what you’re good at. It’s being listened to. When you ask the right questions about what matters to the client, what’s happening in their world and the challenges they face, opportunities emerge.
Which is not to say that networking is without strategy or planning. Be selective about the events you give your time to. Think about who will be there and whether these are the people you need to engage. If it’s a seminar, is the topic relevant to you and your networking target(s)? If you’re interested, you’ll find it much easier to have a meaningful conversation about the subject.
The biggest danger with networking is just ticking the box. The boss expects it of you. Performance review time looms and you need to show you made the effort. With a little thought, and maybe some guidance, you can make your effort count.
If big events make you uncomfortable, go with one other person. Not a team, just one. This makes it easier to approach other people, and for them to approach you. Maybe small events are better for you, or you can organise your own, even if it’s just coffee catchups. When you go to a seminar, make sure you stay for the networking after, rather than make a relieved getaway. And don’t forget your current clients. Networking is just as important for them, to keep the relationship strong and you visible.
Where the system comes in is what you do after the event. Don’t forget to make notes. And make sure you follow up, so they remember you. If you promised information, send it. If you didn’t, maybe there’s an article you or one of your colleagues wrote that may be useful to them. Put yourself top of mind.
Whatever you do, authenticity matters more than technique. If you’re genuinely interested in the person and their business success, it will show.
All this makes networking sound like an individual activity, which it is. But it’s a firm issue, too. Leadership needs to model effective networking, as well as allocate time and budget for business development training. It needs to recognise and support networking efforts rather than just chargeability.
Networking is a learnable skill. And like most things you learn, it takes guidance and practice to do it well and learn how to transition from pleasantries to meaningful conversations. That’s when the skill pays off.
